What to Expect

Before the first session

You book a time on the calendar and pay for the session at booking. You'll get a confirmation with a link to the secure telehealth room. Before the appointment, you'll complete a brief intake form and a client-therapist agreement — a few pages, done from your phone or laptop, that cover the basics: history, what's bringing you in, and the standard confidentiality and consent language. Paul reads them before you meet so the first session isn't spent on paperwork.

The first session

Fifty minutes, virtual, from wherever you have a private door that closes. The first twenty or so are usually you laying out what's going on, in whatever order it comes out. You do not need a polished summary. If it comes out sideways, that's fine — most of it does. Paul's job in that first stretch is to listen carefully, ask a few targeted questions, and start to see the shape of what you're describing.

The middle of the session shifts from "what's happening" to "what would count as better." Real goals — the kind you can actually measure in your day-to-day life — usually surface here. Sometimes they're specific ("I want to be able to be in bed with my wife without the whole thing feeling like an exam"). Sometimes they're broader ("I want to stop feeling like a stranger to myself"). Both work.

The last piece of the first session is a straight conversation about fit and about what to actually do next. Paul will tell you plainly whether this looks like something he thinks he can help with, whether a different kind of specialist would serve you better, and what a reasonable next few weeks might look like. You leave with a real sense of direction, not a vague "let's see how it goes."

Sessions after the first

Most men meet weekly at the start. That cadence matters more than most people expect; the momentum between sessions is a lot of what makes therapy work, and gapping it out to once a month for logistical reasons usually slows things down considerably. As things stabilize, some men shift to every other week. Some stay weekly for longer because the work benefits from it. Neither is "better" — it depends on what you're working on.

Sessions themselves are conversational. This isn't a practice that runs on silence or on you talking for fifty minutes into a nodding face. Paul is active in the room — questions, reflections, occasional pushback, and concrete tools when they're useful. Sometimes there's homework: something specific to notice, try, or track between sessions. Not busywork; the point is to let the work move outside the room.

The honest part

Therapy is real work. It is not entertainment, it is not friendship, and it is not a place to be told everything is fine. It is a place to see yourself clearly, which is frequently uncomfortable in the middle even when it's what you asked for. Progress usually looks like a few weeks of insight, then a plateau, then a sudden noticeable shift in how you're actually behaving. That non-linear shape throws people. It is normal.

You are allowed to raise concerns about the therapy itself, about pace, about anything Paul says that lands wrong. That conversation is part of the work, not an interruption of it.

Ending well

Good therapy has an ending. Some men are here for a specific piece of work and finish in a few months. Others stay longer because the field of what they're working on keeps opening. Either way, when the work is done or when you want to pause, we talk about it directly, wrap the pieces that need wrapping, and end cleanly. You are welcome back anytime later if life calls for it.